50. Kids’ College

Scott graduated from Occidental College. Initially, he intended to go to UC, but UCLA rejected his application. A black kid whose grade was lower than Scott was accepted. In America, college does not just look at the grades or SAT scores. They look at other activities, achievement, and essay. In a way, it is rather very subjective process. They look at the ethnicity, and apply loose standards toward the black and Latinos. Asian kids who achieve higher academic level are disadvantaged.

 

I wrote to UCLA and asked them to explain how they determined to reject Scott’s application. They replied and said they would reconsider it if the request came from the student. Scott did not want to appeal it. He was interested in Occidental College. Occidental soccer coach approached him.

 

In college sports, the schools are divided into Divisions based on the size of the program. Occidental College was in Division III. To pursue sports career, you need to be in Division I program to get the better exposure. Scott transferred to UC Irvine in his junior year and trained with the soccer team during the summer vacation. It was not easy for him to make the starting role as junior walk on. So, he returned to Occidental.

 

Michael was accepted by UC Santa Barbara (UCSB). He rather wanted to go to Cal State University Northridge (CSUN). His girlfriend was there and he did not want to leave home. I made the same common mistake most Korean parents made.

 

Academically, UCSB was better school. Anyone with GPA of 3.0 would go to Cal State. I forced him to go to UCSB. He did not complete his English assignment and got D from the class in spring semester. UCSB cancelled his admission. I wonder if he did that on purpose.

 

I talked to his English teacher and asked her to give him the second chance. I made Michael complete his assignment. She changed his grade to C and UCSB reversed the cancellation and accepted him again. UCSB had the quarter system. They had three quarters and the summer session. After his first quarter, he told me he did not want to continue there. He wanted to quit UCSB and come home. I said some harsh words, scolded him, and sent him back to school. A month into the 2nd quarter, I got a call from him one night. He was crying over the phone and said he could not do it anymore. I realized I could not force him anymore. I told him he could come home.

 

He had been in and out of 2 years college for several years, but never finished it. It was my fault. For my own vanity and boast, I forced him. I greatly regret it now. I should have let him to go to Cal State.

 

Brian never caused any problem. While in high school, he won a couple of essay contests. He maintained A grades and got the scholarship given by the state. He was accepted by both UC Berkley and UCLA. Objectively, UC Berkley was the better school. But UCLA would cost me less money. It’s 7 hours’ drive from LA to Berkley and the transportation would be an issue. For him to come home during holidays and vacations, he had to take airplanes and tickets were not cheap. It would be easy and convenient if he went to UCLA. UCLA was still a good school.

 

I explained my situation to Brian. He never questioned it and went to UCLA. I knew he wanted to go to UC Berkley. He has never expressed any regret to me. I thank him for that. If I could do it again, I would ask him his choice and send him there.

 

Now, it was Katherine’s turn.